My last blog post was about falling in love with your foster and how hard it was to give them up. Well what if the opposite happens, what if you really can’t stand your foster. If it has not happened to you, just wait, it will. Most of the time it comes when you take a foster someone else wants saved. You really have to pick your own; you are more likely to tolerate their short comings because you were drawn to them in the first place. I have noticed when I let someone else pick my foster, (I saved one someone else wanted saved) I am less patient and more frustrated; I don’t think this is a coincidence. Whatever draws us to an animal is also what keeps us sane while fostering it.
So you have this foster that you have completely not bonded with, they wear on your last nerve and you are ready to pull your hair out, what do you do?
So you have this foster that you have completely not bonded with, they wear on your last nerve and you are ready to pull your hair out, what do you do?
Do you adopt him to the first person who shows the slightest interest to free yourself from this horrible creature that has invaded your house? Do you run back to the shelter and cry uncle? Nope you took him so you are stuck with him. My best advice is really taking a very big deep breath. The more you dislike your foster the more you project that. Find his positive qualities and focus on those. Work on training for those issues that are driving you up a wall and realize that the person who does adopt him will most likely find some of the things that drive you batty endearing because they love the little monster.
Make sure you don’t lie when adopting him out, like is he house broken and you say yes, and in fact he is not 100%. Be creative in your answer, we are working on that but he is still a puppy and will have accidents but positive reinforcement is working. Not a lie… Does he chew, correct answer, he is a puppy all puppies will chew. We are careful to pick things up we don’t want chewed on and give him plenty of access to appropriate things to chew on and we crate him when we are not home. These types of answers set an expectation that yes he will have accidents, he will chew, but they are things that can be worked on and managed. If you said he is house broken and does not chew then they are going to be ticked when he pees on the good rug and chews up their shoes.
Most importantly be honest with yourself and see if he is doing anything that fosters in the past did not do and if the answer is not really, realize it is just a personality issue and that does happen. Work harder on the training so this dog becomes more adoptable and make sure he has plenty of access via online and offsite events for someone to love him especially since you don’t.
I will add though if the foster issue is not petty little things that wear on your nerves and more serious issues such as aggression, dominance etc., then those are completely different issues and need to be addressed differently and depending on each foster’s circumstance on how. No one should be faulted for taking back a foster that is bad fit in their pack or in their home especially when children are around. Never risked the safety of your personal pets or family for a foster, unfortunately until things change in Montgomery Co there is an endless supply of animals who would be grateful for the warm bed and home to sleep in.
In closing, anyone want a wire haired dachshund, I swear he is the perfect dog! He even poops 24K gold bars… Anyone???? I really don’t like this dog!
Nancy
Volunteer
Make sure you don’t lie when adopting him out, like is he house broken and you say yes, and in fact he is not 100%. Be creative in your answer, we are working on that but he is still a puppy and will have accidents but positive reinforcement is working. Not a lie… Does he chew, correct answer, he is a puppy all puppies will chew. We are careful to pick things up we don’t want chewed on and give him plenty of access to appropriate things to chew on and we crate him when we are not home. These types of answers set an expectation that yes he will have accidents, he will chew, but they are things that can be worked on and managed. If you said he is house broken and does not chew then they are going to be ticked when he pees on the good rug and chews up their shoes.
Most importantly be honest with yourself and see if he is doing anything that fosters in the past did not do and if the answer is not really, realize it is just a personality issue and that does happen. Work harder on the training so this dog becomes more adoptable and make sure he has plenty of access via online and offsite events for someone to love him especially since you don’t.
I will add though if the foster issue is not petty little things that wear on your nerves and more serious issues such as aggression, dominance etc., then those are completely different issues and need to be addressed differently and depending on each foster’s circumstance on how. No one should be faulted for taking back a foster that is bad fit in their pack or in their home especially when children are around. Never risked the safety of your personal pets or family for a foster, unfortunately until things change in Montgomery Co there is an endless supply of animals who would be grateful for the warm bed and home to sleep in.
In closing, anyone want a wire haired dachshund, I swear he is the perfect dog! He even poops 24K gold bars… Anyone???? I really don’t like this dog!
Nancy
Volunteer
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